I Am Not Sure if I Am an FTM?
I never really felt as if I was male or female.. I like all that "boys" like including girls..
I had very long hair and when I cut it I felt so liberated yet I missed it!
I been battling these feelings for about 2 years now about me feeling like a dude more than ever (since I never really thought about it)
I have a girlfriend and well sex is always played as if I am a biomale because I want it that way.. at first she was a bit weird-out but she doesn’t mind no more.
I don’t mind her touching me or treating me as a female.. I don’t mind at all.. that’s where I get confused I think FTM don’t like that stuff..
and I honestly don’t want to have breast.. I order a binder for the first time a couple of days ago thats a big step for me I think..
I don’t know how I feel about surgery if I wanted to proceed with this.. I don’t really mind the idea of top surgery I find it actually quite liberating and me* but I feel like I will miss it even in the bed you know? though I hate how it they look under my shirt!
and I don’t think I would want to have the bottom surgery what so ever but I always picture myself having a penis.. and I feel like a dude 95% of the time..
I don’t like the idea of taking T because of the side effect but if it wasn’t for that I would most likely do it..
I hate my name! and I want to change it to a male name.. but not even my gf calls me by that name and I haven’t really told her.. I would feel weird.. but My bfff calls me by the male name I like and I LOVE IT!
Idk what I should do and I know I should just wait but I like to hear if this is part of a process or am I just weird idk…
Oh I also Hate body hair.. and I am muscular for a chick naturally.. and I love that.. If it wasn’t for my breast I looked pretty boyish to me and I love that.
You sound sorta like me in some aspects. I’m a tranny boy, an I also don’t like things like body hair, an I think I only wan to take testosterone for a couple years so I’m masculine, but more fem gay boy, than butch man. And I don’t want bottom surgery because I don’t think the technology is good enough, though if I could trade in what I got for a wee wee, I’d do it in two seconds. You are defiantly transgender. I wouldn’t worry too much about labeling yourself, but continue to just do what is you, and what comes comfortable to you and natural, there aren’t any rules when it comes to being yourself.
I agree with both Radgal and Boom Boom
Woman Born Transsexual not Transgendered
(post op)
I have two suggestions:
1. Talk with a GENDER therapist:
http://www.DrBecky.com/therapists.html
2. Talk with some transsexual men about their experiences. You can do that here:
http://www.Susans.org/forums Click "Transsexual Talk" and the "FtM" section is right on top.
Don’t worry about labels and stereotypes right now. Just concentrate on your feelings; be you!
Good Luck!